things I think you should do

i.e. How to Have a Happier Life (in my personal opinion)
see a beautiful movie: I LOVED this movie... it is a beautiful film (as Kara used to say) that is so engaging... I never got bored for one second! I laughed, I cried, I was moved. Convince your husband to go (cough *Mom* cough) and see this movie. You won't be sorry.

spend time with/learn from people who are smarter than you:
I pretty much do this every single day. Even if you're not in school... maybe "smarter than" is a little harsh... but someone who knows more about something than you. Someone who has different spiritual gifts. Whatever. Ask them to have coffee with you and then soak it all in. You don't have to say, "hey, you're smarter than me, can we hang out?" People (most people, anyway) love to be pursued and invested in... so do it!

listen to delectable music:
my two always recommendations - Ingrid Michaelson's album "Be OK" and Andrew Bird's "The Mysterious Production of Eggs." (I'm clearly concerned with equal representation here.)
Both are just nothing short of delightful and come highly recommended by ME!

do something really fun and totally below your maturity level:
(i.e. go somewhere where you will surely be the oldest person in attendance)
for example: going to Jump Street - wall to wall trampolines.
we were the oldest people there by a good 10 years.
do something every day that scares you.
No, I'm totally just kidding. That would be a super lame thing to say.
Just wanted to see if you were paying attention.

do shamelessly indulge in something you consider to be a little bit embarrassing:
like get overly invested in a reality show (i.e. join a Fantasy Bachelor league.) Or read the same books that 14 year olds are fawning over (i.e. Twilight. All 4.) I'm not sorry. Sidenote: one of my Bachelor girls got the boot this week. Sayonara, Kari.
admit you were wrong about something:
So, I finally (eons later) finished The Shack. And you know what, I didn't hate it. Still I will admit, it was not my favorite book ever - nor was it all that well-written. But when I let myself be open to what its message was, I found some things that REALLY hit home. A big huge shout out to Jennifer Shively for bringing this to my attention. I spoke a little too soon. Pulitzer Prize winning it is not, but theologically interesting it certainly was.

watch tv on dvd.
A personal favorite. This category also includes watching tv online, which I think is just as fun. I have admittedly watched a great deal of Doogie Howser, M.D. - and I loved every minute of it.

quit things that aren't life-giving:
Or... say no to things you don't want to do.
[What does this look like? Don't answer your phone if you don't want to talk; don't go skiing when your friends do; don't go to church for a sunday (crazy, heresy! I know); say no to taking someone's shift at JCrew if you need a night off; etc.]
This, I have found, is a freeing recognition: that I don't have to do stuff I don't want to! I still do, sometimes, but I'm not confined to it. This doesn't mean don't stretch yourself from time to time (I mean, you still have to do one thing every day that scares you, obviously.) Fyi: I stole this piece of advice from someone smarter than me. (See what I did there?)

Now I am totally going to plagiarize Erin Cooper here...
What do YOU recommend as a tip for a happier life?

love it when song lyrics speak to my life

I saw Bride Wars last night... and let me start by saying that one of two things needs to happen in my life: I either need to not be single, or stop seeing movies about weddings. That's pretty much what it boils down to. No more romantic comedies for me.
Ok so... there is a song in the movie called "Dream" by Priscilla Ahn... who I like a lot... she has a really pretty, quiet voice, and her songs are a little bit like lullabies, which is nice from time to time. Anyway this song played, so I downloaded it when I got home, and I was excited because of reasons I will tell you in a minute. Here's how it goes...

"Once I was a little girl, alone in my little world, who dreamed of a little home for me. I played pretend between the trees, and fed my houseguests bark and leaves, and laughed in my pretty bed of green. I had a dream... that I could fly from the highest swing, I had a dream.
Long walks in the dark through woods grown behind the park, I asked God who I'm supposed to be. The stars smiled down on me, God answered in silent reverie. I said a prayer and fell asleep.
I had a dream... that I could fly from the highest tree, I had a dream.
Now I'm old and feeling grey. I don't know what's left to say about this life I'm willing to leave.
I lived it full and I lived it well, there's many tales I've lived to tell. I'm ready now, I'm ready now, I'm ready now to fly from the highest wing... I had a dream."

Yeah, its a nice song, but here is why I love it so: because I DID THAT! See the italics? In our house on Greenleaf, I totally used to sit between two trees in our backyard and play pretend and dream and have guests and feed them naturey crap. Mom - you will remember - you and Thom used to make fun of me for sitting out there and pretty much talking to myself slash the occasional imaginary person. So today, I have been enjoying remembering the simplicity of life between the trees. Being a kid was so great.

peace, love, and 3 day weekends...
megan mcgregor greaves signing off from between the trees

chi town got tip drill

I went to Chicago!
I saw Thomas:I saw Emily: I saw Kristin:And... I saw WICKED!!What a glorious time. It was such a fun weekend. Catching up with Kristin and Emily, viewing Thomas' Northwestern life... braving the terrible SNOW! Plus Wicked was AMAZINGGGG... seriously. It was SO GOOD. and, thanks to Thom, we had AMAZING seats, too! Yes, all of these caps are necessary to emphasize how grand the experience was. I loved it. Full pictures here: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2043131&l=b575a&id=24900146

The Bachelor started last week... so fun. I am in a fantasy Bachelor league... I have a team of 5 girls and I get points when they do well. If I win, I get a dozen roses sent to me! It is so funny and fun to have a vested interest in what happens. I watched it last night with Chelsea and our commentary was clearly hysterical. If you watch, I picked (in order of how much I like them) - Jillian, interior designer from Canada; Melissa, former Dallas Cowboys cheerleader; Kari, who wears her hair funny and wrote Jason a poem; Stephanie, the old, scary looking widow and single mother who is absolutely the nicest person ever; and Nikki, who got the first impression rose and whose boobs are perpetually hanging out all over the place. FYI.

Started my intercession class yesterday... 5 hours of theology, every day, for two weeks. EEEEEK. its hard to pay attention to ANYTHING for 5 hours at a time. Unless it is Twilight. Which I am done with, by the way. All 4 books. A little bit sad... but just in time to focus on school again, which is good, I guess.

This particular blog post goes out to Erin Cooper, so she can get a good, voyeuristic look into my life, which she requested this morning. Here you are, my creepy little friend. Check her out in the blogroll right to the right. I have also added www.ihategreenbeans.com which you will love if you love the Bachelor (cough *Amie* cough).

ok, there it is. blogging. I'll try to remember to do it more often...

a happy new year, to all that is living - to all that is gentle, kind, and forgiving

a year in review...

last january, I started babysitting for cutie pie, Bodie:
and I went to visit my alma mater:
in feb and march, nothing very cool happened.
I played with my friends. and I had really long hair.
in April, I turned 23, and my friends (new and old) were fabulous.
AND THEN, I cut off all my hair!
May was a good month... I house-sat for a sweet house with Allison...and Cally and Adrian became Mr and Mrs Chenault!and in June, Emily Lebens became Mrs. Cameron Young...
then in July... yes... another wedding! Jessi and Brock Dahl.
We celebrated, in Farrell Fashion, with an 80's themed party... on a party bus.Note the bride: in gown, in front.August... Susan moved in!in September... we saw Sigur Ros at Red Rocks:And October... the Halloween party of the century thrown by the girls of 1403!November (technically December, deal with it) brought Thanksgiving and Ruthie's wedding!and now, December... Holiday fun with the family. also a little violence.Which brings us to the present moment! New Years was kind of a bust... we had high hopes for a fun night out downtown but it was a bit more stressful and annoying than fun. The best part was these shoes, provided by my sweet sister Amie!














So I welcome 2009... and I kiss 2008 SAYONARA! I hope that this new year will bring healing from stupid cancer for my lovely sister, Audrie, and for my sweet friend Wilson.

On a lighter note, I hope also for many more occasions on which to wear those shoes. Because they are fabulous.

Those are the two big ones, really.

And although I am not much for resolutions or any of that crap, I do like the new year... I like the blank slate and all that. I've been listening to a song today that's making me think about this new year in a way thats pretty much a "there's no time like the present" kind of attitude. Its kind of a conversation, it would seem, between God and, well, me. Ha.

"'If you want to see, I can open up your eyes;
and if you want to live, I can open up your life;
and if you want to love, I can open up your heart.'
'Where do we begin? When will this life start?'
'How about now?'" - jonah werner

How about it? Happy New Year!!

my mistake

What a silly oversight on my part - I clearly am aware that Jonathon did not take Carrie's name. My congratulations goes to the Hicks family :) That's what I get for blogging with cousins staring over my shoulder. No more haste for me!

christmas in Kansas: the full story

This is Megan, reporting live from Kansas City, Kansas from Nana's house. Lovin every minute. I have been utterly lazy on this break... lazy especially about keeping you up-to-date on every single minute of my ridiculously exciting life. My apologies. Here's whats been going on over this lovely break.
I am in the middle of the third of four Twilight books. I took a week-ish long hiatus because I couldn't possibly stand another night of reading until 4 am or until whatever ungodly hour I actually finished the book. I have always been a sucker for books... can't sleep till they're finished. The first two didn't even take me a whole day each to finish. Out of control. I am doing a much better job of rationing the third, and am well-rested today to prove it!
Oh, AND I saw the movie. Such a disappointment. The books are way better. And yes, I am 12. Actually, last night at our hotel (on the fashionable Kansas City Plaza) I was on the elevator with a girl who couldn't have been more than 13 and she had the EXACT same book in her hand that I was hiding in my purse. I was so ashamed. Not ashamed enough to stop, but ashamed nonetheless.
I have slept. A lot. Thats about all there is to say about that.
Have had Christmas with my parents, Gram and brother; one with the Farrells, one with my seesters, and now the last with my dad and his side of the fam. Divorced parents leads to lots of different Christmases. Nice to see and be seen, but I'm glad I'm on the home stretch. One can only handle so many gift exchanges, cheese balls, and festive holiday spirits. Always a lovely time, and always a lovely return home as well. Can't wait to write my thank-you notes!
So, really, its been pretty thrilling. I do have my lack of an internship looming gloomily over my head, but I try not to let it get me down. Until last night when my aunt replied to my unknowing with, "So really, you don't actually know anything, do you Meg?" No. I certainly don't. Cue panic attack. But that wasn't the highlight... I think that would have been when my Nana asked me how many patients I have "lost" so far. As in, have any of my clients ended their own lives under my care? It was a terribly pleasant dinner.

I kid, I kid. Gotta love family at the holidays. Makes for some funny blog entries, which is something, I suppose.

Ooh also, let me take this tiny moment to congratulate Mark and Lorrie (and Ethan, Owen, and Audrey, as well!) on the arrival of Elyse Noel Hostetler; and Carrie and Jonathon HICKS on the new pregnancy! Can't wait to see the preciously cute trequel to Marcail and Gabe :) I love babies.

Off I go... big day of brunch, shopping on the Plaza, and Colts football ahead. Gotta keep up!

if you like it then you shoulda put a ring on it

So, in order to help us all get through finals, I made this little video for inspiration (between studying for my Stats final and writing my take-home test for Family Therapy.) It has been a big hit... I even got some emails from professors with compliments. So, if you so desire, you can click this link: http://elfyourself.jibjab.com/view/To6VbH1IdXMevPPRVpCB to see my counseling professors dance a little number for us...

I am relieved to be done with school, and relieved that Audrie is getting healthier after a rough couple days. I may not ever, however, get enough sleep to make up for the last two weeks. we indulged in a bit of finals-are-over madness last night; and by madness, I mean entirely too many people with entirely too little sleep. one round of balderdash took us like 4 hours. We laughed, though, that is for sure... and it was fun.

Plans for Break...
reading multiple books (including Twilight, no judging please); seeing every movie I want to see; skiing tomorrow (barring bad weather); hopefully going to Jump Street (major amounts of indoor trampolines, yes please); a LOT of laundry; Christmas shopping!; home to Wichita for more of the same; back to Denver for New Years!

song of the hour: Single Ladies (Put a Ring on It) by Beyonce. We pretty much sang it (dancing included) all night last night. its just so good.

happy break!

oh, the weather outside is frightful!

well, its been a while.
life highlights:
* I found out today that I have enough credit card points for a plane ticket! this is a big deal. super exciting. where should I go??? my thoughts: Tejas? DC? LA? So hard to decide...
* Finals have descended upon me and are, as always, no fun. Only a test and a take-home left...
* I might ski this weekend. You should probably start praying now.
* ooh - I got the chance to see Trans Siberian Orchestra!! thanks to a good friend, I got to see the light show, the pyrotechnics (FIRE!) and fabulous music... it was so beyond fun. it SNOWED in the Pepsi Center!! if you ever get the chance... do it. thanks to Justin!!
* in 2009, I have plans (already) to see: WICKED in Chicago (!!!!), John Legend, and Andrew Bird. how fabulous is that?
* I have been really big into rebates these days. I said this the other night to my friends and got a big laugh... but I'm serious! I have gotten 3 checks in the mail from rebates. who's laughing now?? coupons too. somewhere along the line, I got a little bit frugal. go figure.

Sunday was a good day. I got to teach Sunday school with my lovely friend Allison... and I tell you, there is just nothing like a 3 year old to make your whole day. Quote of the week, from Peyton, age 3... She said, just with the brightest little matter of fact voice, "Underpants! That is a funny word! You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna go back in the room, and I'm gonna say underpants. And then everybody will laugh!" And you know what? Everybody did. Dreams do come true.
Finished Sunday by getting the chance to go serve at the Denver Rescue Mission... I tell you what, nothing is more humbling. I got to serve cake & pie - and it was just great. I was completely covered in frosting and pie filling by the time they all filed out... worth it. It made me so sad that I am so silly so much of the time. That I have so much but I am so ungrateful! Needless to say... I walked with a little more pep in my step today. With all of their smiles filing through my mind, Joy has come a little easier. I hope to go back more in the future... hold me to it, ok?

songs I'm loving:
mostly Christmas music... well, only Christmas music. lets be honest.
AND, though, a little bit of the Billboard Top 100 too (thank you, Sarah) while I write papers. it pumps me up.

and lastly, on my heart today, is C.S. Lewis:
“It would seem that our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling around with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at sea. We are far too easily pleased.”

Isn't that so true? The slums are no fun. Let's say yes to a holiday at sea.

who are you,little i

(five or six years old)
peering from some high

window;at the gold

of November sunset

(and feeling:that if day
has to become night

this is a beautiful way)
- e.e. cummings

"the vision is hope; and hope is real."

Proof that I am learning too much slash there is too much going on in my brain:
I just wrote 3 different blog entries and got overwhelmed by each one and deleted all of them. Too rambly. My old college pastor, when helping us to write sermons/talks would always remind us that we didn't have to fit everything we knew about everything into that one thirty minute talk. Same kind of thing here. I just can't get it all out. Which is okay.
Here are some tidbits:

- a thing of great beauty: To Write Love On Her Arms. a nonprofit/annual event. "To Write Love On Her Arms is a non-profit movement dedicated to presenting hope and finding help for those struggling with depression, addiction, self-injury and suicide. TWLOHA exists to encourage, inform, inspire, and also to invest directly into treatment and recovery." A beautiful thing. I read this, and I cry every time (without fail): "...Don Miller says we're called 'to hold our hands against the wounds of a broken world, to stop the bleeding.' I agree so greatly. We often ask God to show up. We pray prayers of rescue. Perhaps God would ask us to be that rescue, to be His body, to move for things that matter. He is not invisible when we come alive. I might be simple but more and more, I believe God works in love, speaks in love, is revealed in our love. I have seen that this week and honestly, it has been simple: Take a broken girl, treat her like a famous princess, give her the best seats in the house. Buy her coffee and cigarettes for the coming down, books and bathroom things for the days ahead. Tell her something true when all she's known are lies. Tell her God loves her. Tell her about forgiveness, the possibility of freedom, tell her she was made to dance in white dresses. All these things are true. We won't solve all the mysteries and our hearts will certainly break in such a vulnerable life, but it is the best way. we were made to be lovers bold in broken places, pouring ourselves out again and again until we're called home." (www. twloha.com)

- fun facts: Going to see Ingrid Michaelson tomorrow in concert, followed by Korean Karaoke with my spiritual formation group on Saturday. Thanksgiving in 2 weeks and Christmas break in about 5! Interviewing for Internships... terrifying. But also exciting! Nothing yet but hopefully soon... :)

- looking forward to: family time, free time, getting my hair done, reading for pleasure.

- I am loving: cool weather, amazing sales at J.Crew, pain that equals growth, live music, having FUN, high fives, this blog, and wild sweet orange Tazo tea, available at Starbucks.

And that's all I have. It's late, I'm tired from all this blogging and not actually even posting, and it is past time for bed.

"Yet this I call to mind and therefore I have hope: because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." - Lamentations 3:22-23

it's time to try defying gravity...

(thank you Maybelline eyeshadow for covering my whole face all night long.)(please note my stockings and ruby slippers and broom)
(the hostesses and residents of 1403 university... note my counterpart, Glinda the good witch!)


here it is - halloween. the party (and I do mean THE party... of the year) was a HUGE success. I think there were at least 100 people who came, total - even our neighbors ventured over from their lame party! granted, they were huge creepers, but such is life. it was a GREAT party. I spent the majority of today basking in last night's wonderfulness. I am, however, still sick with some kind of cold/flu type situation... I was able to rally for the party though, never you fear! It was so fun. For a full rundown of the costumes, etc, please visit my facebook album here: http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2041803&l=09f74&id=24900146 (for those of you without facebook.) There were some hilarious costumes... among my favorites were: She-Ra, princess of power; mashed potatoes; Mugatu (from Zoolander); the guy in the shower; 2 mormon missionaries; ghost busters; Ben Franklin; all of the Plastics from Mean Girls; and Quail Man. People went all out! and our house wasn't totally trashed, either, which is GRAND. So fun. I wish it wasn't over!

There you have it.

good new music: new Ray Lamontagne CD (Gossip in the Grain) and new Ingrid Michaelson CD (Be OK) - both winners in their own right. Ingrid's is superb. I highly recommend it!

peace, love, and costume parties...

oh what a day it is today

picture one: out on the town at Rio, which makes the best (and strongest) margs in Denver and perhaps even the surrounding area.
middle picture: this is pre-night on the town. those are my new fabulous jeans that I may never take off ever again. You'll be relieved to know that I washed them finally... no worries.
lastly: Annual Red Bull Soap Box Derby at Red Rocks with Dan (left) and Justin (right). SO FUN. AND, I was informed today, Justin and I made it on the news!! Someone saw us having a ball at the Derb. How cool is that?? I'm famous!

Also, I decided on a Halloween costume... but I'm not telling what it is... I'm just going to post pictures when its done. It's gonna be good...

big hearts to you all!

tag... you're it

This was one of my first tags! I was tagged by my too-sweet-and-kind cousin Carrie, who wrote some way too nice things about me on her blog... and I am happy to respond to the tag and post the seven random facts about YOURS TRULY! Thanks for the tag and for the complements Carrie... what a blessing to have this lovely bloggy relationship to bridge the long distances!


1. I LOVE broadway. I love musicals. I love any show/movie where it is commonplace for any one to break into any kind of catchy tune at any time. I even own some soundtracks to musicals I haven't even seen! I just love them. Not ashamed to admit it. There is nothing like getting into your car and singing "Mamma Mia" all the way to school. Nothing like it.

2. My screen name from middle school to now (although I use it way less slash hardly ever now) was meggs2694. The meggs with two g's was a mistake made by my mother (I was inconsolable for MINUTES.) and the numbers... this is embarrassing... are the transposed football jersey numbers of the two boys I loved at this point in my boy-loving career. I have never told anyone that.

3. I would love nothing more than to keep a journal - but I can never do it for more than about a week before getting miserably sick of it. I just started again 2 days ago. I put less pressure on myself this time, and I'm allowing myself to write even just one sentence each night if I want. I'm hoping it will stick this time! Then, someday, you guys can publish it. Since I'm sooooo brilliant and will inevitably be famous at some point.

4. I've always had this ongoing daydream where I am a wonderful and famous singer. Unfortunately, I get stage fright big time, and I'm also not much of a soloist. Even still - I would love to lead worship or sing anything ever and just have people be in awe of my vocal stylings. However, I'm realistic. I'll stick to singing in church, in the car, and in the shower. Oh, and with my roommate Sarah whenever we're home alone. (We've gotten caught a couple of times belting out showtunes in the kitchen... not good.)

5. I do voices. I love doing voices. I even kind of think they're kind of good. They're accurate, anyway. I'm possibly a little proud of the talent. Several are highly embarrassing... and I will not start doing them on command. So don't bother asking. :)

(I feel like 7 things is a lot and I'm having some trouble...)

6. If I could change one thing about myself, I would be a morning person. Seriously. I think morning people are so great. I have never been one. I have become more of one as I have gotten older, but I'm still pretty sucky. Someday, I hope to be a full-fledged morning person. I think that would be just fabulous.

7. I download every free song that ITunes offers. Often they are really bad and I end up deleting them... but I always do it. Can't pass up something free!!

I just want to feel today, feel today, feel today... I just want to feel something today

I know, I know, it has been a while. A LONG while. I've actually been feeling really bloggy the last couple of days... real introspective and insightful... but alas, my poor tiny computer has been at the Apple store with the "geniuses" for the past FOUR DAYS!!! I swear, its like an appendage has been removed from my body. I am aimless and without purpose without Facebook to check, emails to write, blogs to read... its actually giving me some insight into how much time/life I waste watching TV online and other pointless enterprises. Hmm. So while I do feel disconnected from life (no g-chatting, no emails 24/7, no weather checking...) it is actually a little freeing. I went today in an act of desperation to inquire about how much longer I must live in this limbo, and the answer was two more days. I can't tell you how not fun this is. However, I will continue to take advantage of all my free time and try to make the best of a horrid situation. Ha-ha. Life is so hard, isn't it?

Lets see... important updates include that my roomies and I are throwing a Halloween party to which we so far have THIRTY FIVE affirmative RSVP's and 20-something maybes!! While I'm feeling quite popular, I also feel a lot of pressure to A) find a killer costume and B) make the party real fun. With regard to A) - I am accepting suggestions. Today I made my facebook status to say, "megan is accepting suggestions for my halloween costume" and I have recieved the following suggestions (all of which have caused me to laugh uncontrollably in the DenSem computer lab, which is awkward.)
- a newt (thanks Paul)
- big Sonya (thanks Carla slash the scary mexican girl who went to Carla's high school... i.e. Big Sonya)
- the man from the game operation (which entails a nude body suit with bones painted on) - thanks Kate
- Maria VonTrapp (thanks also to Kate)
- the Koolaid Man (thanks Kara)
- Yoshi from Nintendo (Kara again)

All excellent suggestions, but none are the one. Allison keeps suggesting Tina Turner... not sure why... :) and other people have tried to be helpful as well. My manager (and friend) Grace from JCrew says she is coming as a streaker. Should be an interesting party. Please comment with your suggestions!! I am really struggling here!!

In other news, I bought a pair of skinny jeans, and I am actually and literally obsessed with them. I have worn them every day since I bought them on Friday, except for yesterday when I wore workout pants all day. Had I gotten dressed, I'm certain I would have worn them then too. They are from Gap, and they are fabulous. Sometimes in life we are blessed to find an article of clothing that looks and feels fabulous and fashionable and make you feel HOT. These are that blessing. I may never wear another pair of pants as long as I live.

That is really my report for now... The mouse count (i.e. mice who have died for daring enter my bedroom) is at 2, but I haven't seen another one (Praise Jesus) in several weeks. The second one was far less dramatic than Gus-Gus too, he just died in the trap while I was out of town. Gross, but fine with me. Spare me the mouse drama. I'm so over it.

Ok, so, Halloween is coming, pumpkin flavored things are everywhere, and life is but a dream. School continues to be hard and challenging, although most of the challenge this semester is emotional in nature and not so much academic. Masters in Counseling is kind of like being in counseling... all the time. Not that fun. I mean, yes, it is good, but I think there is a hump to get over of understanding how to live in a world where things are horrible, feeling the horrible, and being okay in spite of it. I learned this lesson from - don't laugh - Grey's Anatomy. The main character, Meredith, is in counseling, until one day she says "I'm quitting therapy, because I'm happy. I don't need it anymore." In the course of the episode, terrible things happen... a patient she likes dies, her relationships are challenged... blah blah. At the end, she runs into her therapist in the elevator. She gets all heated and says to her counselor, "What was the point of it? What is the point of doing any of that work? The world is just horrible!" Her therapist turns to her (and I tear up) and says, "Yes, Meredith, the world is horrible. The point is not to ignore the horrible and be happy anyway. The point is to learn how to feel the horrible!!" I can't tell you how this resonates with me... Yes, it's Grey's Anatomy, and yes, its dumb to learn life lessons from primetime television - but this is good stuff. I'm in grad school, so you can trust me when I say that.

So, I love you all, blog-readers, and I hope all is well for you. I hope you feel the horrible, and I hope that in the horrible you get to experience the goodness and the faithfulness of a God who enters into your struggles - who meets you in the battlefield - who doesn't leave you to fight it out alone. I hope that when you cry out to God, you experience God's response: I know. There are no answers, and if there were, they wouldn't be sufficient anyway - I think deep down, I know that. The most powerful thing in a time of great trial is to have someone who truly understands where you are and what you're going through. To have someone hear your story and begin to weep with you - to say, "I know where you've been. I've been there too." It's a hard thing to wrap my mind around, but I believe that God meets us where we are - in the hospital bed, in the pit of grief and despair, in the throes of addiction, in our loneliness, in our sadness, in our anger - and God pulls us close and says, "I know. I know where you have been. I have been there too... and I'll go there with you now."

adventures with Timmy and MegMeg